Holiday Frustrations
Filed under Adoptive Families, Fraud and Scams by Elizabeth Ehlen
This is about the time of year that A Gift of Hope Adoptions starts send out a lot of packets to prospective adoptive parents and get a lot of calls and emails from frustrated adoptive parents. It's understandable, as everyone is hoping to be able to celebrate the holidays with a new little one. However, it is important not to allow yourself to fall into the attitude of "I want a baby for Christmas." Everyone wants a baby for Christmas, but it's important not to let that consume your thoughts this holiday season. This attitude will only magnify your frustrations, and spill over into other areas of your life. The holidays are stressful enough without adding a dark cloud over yourself that neither you nor your adoption professional can do anything about. After all, your adoption professional has been working diligently for you all year (or for however long you've been working with them) and can't magically produce babies at the time of year you happen to be more nostalgic about them – as much as we would love to be able to do so! It's important not to be unrealistic about the process, or make demands of your adoption professional that both you and they know are unrealistic. We've actually received phone calls from adoptive parents demanding to have a baby by such and such a date, and that is not just unrealistic but impossible to promise. Don't believe any "professional" who makes that type of promise – they are not to be trusted.
It is also important to note that a lot of adoption scammers come out of the woodwork during holidays. They know that you're feeling sad and vulnerable, and will use these emotions against you. We have more calls from scammers over the holidays than any other time of year. In fact, adoption scams were recently featured on a national morning show as a holiday scam to be wary of – check out the video at this link: http://www.mandjshow.com/videos/a-nightmare-before-christmas/
In summary, Babies come when they decide to come, and while there might be a Christmas miracle there might not. So for the holidays focus on the positives, that you get to celebrate with your family and friends, and make your holiday wish for a healthy and happy new child next year!
